This is nearly 20 minutes of "trans 101" and parts of it really resonate for the ace community as well - 12:30 is right around one of the charts that lists "neither" as an orientation option =D



I hope everyone is having safe holiday adventures =)

I seem to remember a few posts a while ago about asexuality dealt with in literature, and outstanding examples of same. It just occurred to me when I went to see the new Sherlock Holmes movie today, then read some reviews to see how it went by the critics. One of their main criticisms was Holmes' romantic/quasi-sexual interest in the film being out of sync with the books, as the character is described as originally "asexual."
Now I know sometimes anything short of nymphomania is decried as "asexual" in modern media, but it got me wondering about the examples of primarily asexual characters in books, possibly including the original Sherlock Holmes. At any rate, the romantic relationship in the movie never actually lead to any sex scenes, which is nice for me (not having to sit boredly through them as in most movies I can't fast-forward) and unusual in a lot of big Hollywood movies that seem to feel it's a prerequisite.
Any Conan Doyle fans care to comment?

I've been doing lot of thinking lately, and it's been bugging me so much, so I'm just going to get this out here.

As someone who just recently labelled herself asexual a few weeks ago, I do show the traits of one. I don't feel sexual attraction (though I do find people aesthetically-pleasing and I do feel romantic attraction), and I feel uncomfortable with the prospect of having sex--with anyone.

However, I do read erotica and sometimes find myself aroused by it. Does this still make me asexual? I know the line is blurry between feeling sexual attraction and arousal, and that they don't go hand and hand, but is this possible? If it is any indication, I enjoy reading erotica, but if you hand me visual porn, I will visibly blanch and recoil into my shell. I guess you could say I'm sexually attracted to the words.

Do I still fit under the asexual label or somewhere else entirely? Are there any asexuals out there that feel this way as well? Why is it that we cannot feel sexual attraction, but can be easily aroused by the written word?

Thanks in advance for clearing any doubts up for me (I'm still new at coming out and am obviously shy with jumping into the pool of asking questions).

Okay, I keep hearing about asexuals who are something called aromatic or in relationships. Are there asexuals out there simply not into relationships or human companionship at all? The idea of having to give up some of my time for someone or deal with any sort of drama with someone is a pretty big turn off for me. I just never seemed that interested in hooking up. Once in awhile I'll think "Gee it would be nice to hold hands with someone or buy them a cute teddy bear on Valentine's day" but other than that I haven't really been compelled to search for anything. I'm 22 years old and have never dated or even kissed with tongue, total virgin. Relationships just never appealed to me for most of my life and when I'm asked out by guys at the job or even girls, I get really uncomfortable and decline.

I just honestly don't feel like I need someone. That's not to say I may never EVER have a relationship but the feelings just aren't there to search for one.

My parents seem to be secretly worried and they hint at boyfriend junk all the time but It'd be too bothersome to explain that I just don't like ANYONE.

I just want to know if I'm the only human being like this. Everyone is so damn obsessed with love, romance, and sex in this world. I'm interested in NON of that. The love I have with my friends and family is love enough and romance just seems like a silly idea this and other particular cultures are obsessed with. I just don't get any of it.

I'm fine!

I'm 30 years old, female. I recently (the last year or so) have noticed in myself a desire to NOT want a relationship or sexual contact. ( Read more... )

LiveJournal's making a change to the gender setting on the profile page.

* Gender will be a mandatory field at account creation.

* LiveJournal is removing the Unspecified option for the gender field. That's right: you get to be male or female. Period. That's it. (Source.)

I... I don't even have words to explain how much this hurts me. And it does hurt, because I can't see what good limiting the gender option does at all, especially if the information is staying private.

It's probably silly of me to be crying about this, but I just don't need this shit right now.

(For those who'd like suggestions on how to deal with this, this post has some ideas, which is where I found out about it.)


[Edit] Apparently the change is not going through (edit at the bottom of the page), sorry!

I have a question for you all.

Regardless of the fact that you may or may not find people sexually appealing, do you still have sexual and or erotic dreams? I have them, though rarely, and I wouldn't label them "wet dreams" as they aren't at all arousing. To me they just seems like fragmented nude imagery. O_o I have also noticed that the person I am supposedly having sex with never has a face or a discernible gender. I have a feeling that it is usually male though I never see evidence of such.

So, what do you all think: Are asexuals still susceptible to erotic dreams? What of this blank-faced phenomenon? Anyone care to share any particularly peculiar dreams?

Hey there.

I consider myself asexual because I live asexually. I just don't find other people very interesting. I prefer my hobbies, time alone, and contact in doses, much more appropriate.

I'm just not sure I would call it a sexual orientation. (At least concerning myself)

I guess I can't help feeling the way I do but I guess calling it "sexual orientation" seems heavy. Feels like a need to label it as something even when there's nothing backing it up or much public knowledge.

Also apparently some folks asexuality may actually be result of a mental condition or biological/medical one.

This could be my case, not sure.

I don't think it matters because I still call myself asexual for now because I live this way. It's the best way to describe my current way of life.

Anyone else sort of wear the label this way too?

I just don't know if I would wear it as a sexual orientation at least when talking about myself.

although it gets complicated once people start arguing what exactly counts as sexual orientation or how it gets defined.

regardless I'm talking about the personal use of the label asexual.

Hey everybody!

I'm an undergraduate at Reed College, and not too long from now (in about 6 months or so) I'm going to start writing my undergraduate thesis in psychology. I'm really interested in asexuality for two main reasons: much of the research into sexual orientation has ignored asexuality entirely (and that should be corrected!), and asexuality highlights some of the problems I see withi the DSM (the "bible" of psychiatry).

Although I'm not certain, I'm seriously thinking about thesising on asexuality and conducting a survey online with participants recruited through websites like this and AVEN. I haven't done a review of the research already out there yet, but I would like to hear from you.

What kind of questions would you like to see researched? What do you think are the important questions I should be looking at? What tips or advice would you give to someone who wanted to create a survey for asexuals?

I figure that it would be good to get feedback from the people I want to study about how what they think is important for studying, instead of just focusing on what kinds of questions the academic establishment might focus on. Also, who else but you knows best about what is polite, appropriate, and relevant?

Finally, if you are interested in participating in such a study feel free to comment and tell me so. (Obviously, it will be several months before I would start up the study, but I'm just curious to see if there is interest.)